How to Overcome Your Fear of Dating Post-Divorce

There is no rule as to when is the right time to date after divorce, it’s purely about when you feel ready to dip your toe in the water. It does depend on the type of person you are and that means that some people will rush out there and date anyone and everyone. The problem with doing that is it often results in disillusionment and can put you off dating for a long time! So while there’s no rule as such, it’s best to date after divorce slowly and surely. Make sure you definitely don’t overload yourself with dates every night of the week because it can be confusing not to mention exhausting!

Make It Happen!

If you haven’t started dating yet it can feel like it’s a real hurdle to get over, but once you start, you’ll be right out there mingling and meeting new people. It sounds that simple and it really is! It’s about having the confidence in yourself to move forward. Remember, you’re not alone; there are millions of people around the world who are thinking about dating for the first time after their divorce. No one says it’s easy to get yourself out there but it’s as hard as you make it. If you want to meet someone you need to date, so arm yourself with all the right tools and make it happen!

Be Kind To Yourself!

The first thing you need to do is be kind to yourself! So that means to stop beating yourself up over your divorce and start realising that you are a fantastic person, inside and out. If you feel good it will filter through to the way you look and also to the way you come across to new people you meet. Feeling negative shows on your facial expressions and in your body language – it’s a real turn off to other people. You’ll have learnt a lot along the journey of your divorce and you’ll be wiser and stronger so use this to your advantage. Remember that underneath that new layer you’ll still be the same person, which means you’re still be capable of having fun! Additionally, you’re still as attractive as you were before marriage as long as you remember to take care of your appearance. So if you do need some TLC, for example, a new “dating” wardrobe, perhaps a re-style or you want to lose weight – set yourself some goals. As you tick off this list of goals, you’ll feel better and better about yourself and this will boost your confidence too.

Put Yourself In The Right Situation

You also need to put yourself in situations that could lead you to meeting likeminded people. Of course you should be going out, no one’s going to meet anyone else staying in but there are opportunities even when you’re sitting on your sofa! Online dating is an incredible success which is why thousands of people sign up to it every day. People just like you, who want to get over that first hurdle post-divorce and want to date. So why don’t you browse through the other profiles on Next Love to inspire you to join up? The site is dedicated to divorcees and people who’ve been in long-term relationships but experienced a break-up. It’s especially for you and helps to make the dating process easier, enjoyable and mostly, successful! Create your profile and explain who you’re looking for then watch your inbox fill-up with potential dates. This is the type of “meeting people” you can do in the comfort of your own home and once you’ve decided who you want to date then you can go out there and get to know them!

Get Back On The Bike!

Now you’ve decided to date you need to remind yourself that you’re bound to be rusty because it’s been a while. Remember, you used to date and so you definitely know how to do it, it’s just reminding yourself how it’s done. It’s rather like getting back onto a bicycle after you’ve spent years taking the bus – it’s something that doesn’t need to be taught, you just need to remind yourself how to do it. No one is a professional when dating; if you stick to being yourself and try to relax and enjoy the experience you will be fine.
Once you’ve been on your first date, whether you want to see the other person again or not, remind yourself you’ve accomplished something. You’ve done it – you’ve got through that first dating hurdle post and now you know it was perfectly fine, (maybe it was great) you also know you can do it again! What are you waiting for? See who’s out there for you on Next Love.