Giving Marriage A Second Chance
Marriage is a complex institution and many times, couples find the strain of daily adjustments destabilizing its core framework leading to the ultimate breakdown.
Many times, one is a mere puppet in God’s bigger plan and the separation from the spouse could be due to a sudden accident and eventual death or an illness. Whatever it is the question that bothers most is whether marriage deserves a second chance and how can you make it a happy experience after having failed the first time.
Let’s face it, companionship is crucial for us and you don’t want to let the bitterness of one relationship seep through into others. But here is a basic roadmap that can help you ensure a better shot at happiness when you tie the knot second time on.
Second Marriage: The Do’s
- Treat Every Relationship Separately:
Do not base the premise of one relationship on another previous experience. A case by case approach is relatively better giving a fair chance to your spouse and a level playing field for both partners to make the relationship work. Think about all the things that went wrong the first time on and try to incorporate the changes within you to make this one better.
- Don’t Give Up Courtship:
There is no rule that says courtship is only a pre-marital state. Keep the spark of romance alive. It will not just help both partners to ease into a relationship effortlessly but also create a stronger bond for the long-term. Share Your Dreams: If you have decided to spend your life with someone, make your spouse feel special. Share your dreams and how you achieve them. This will improve your interaction with them and feel better connected with your spouse.
- Second Marriage: The Don’ts
This is relatively tricky but equally important.
Manage Your Finances: It is surprising how money can be a bone of contention in a marriage, especially second time on. Clarify your individual terms, liabilities and commitments to the family so that it does not create a rift later on.
Don’t Hold Past Grudges: This is one bit of advice that everybody is guaranteed to give, but it, nevertheless, is an important point. Do not hold past grudges, sometimes it can wreak havoc in your present marriage and ruin your happiness currently.
Don’t Shun Away From Sex: Do not make the mistake of downgrading the importance of sex in your marriage the second time on. Communicate clearly with your partner about your preferences and try and make space for what your partner likes. This also helps nurture mutual respect in a relationship over a point of time.
A second marriage poses many unique challenges and following the mid-path comprising of appeasement and mutual respect is primary. Couples need to be sensitive to each other’s demands and avoid looking at situations in a selfish me-centric approach. Happiness and joy are all pre-decided as per the Almighty’s plan. As mere puppets, what we need to do is play the act genuinely, wholeheartedly and laced with love. It is that one single force that can transcend you to the land of happiness and eternal mirth.